Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Musings - Wednesday, July 15

Lately, I've been doing a church music internship in Indianapolis. I've been thinking a ton about the intent of my songwriting, why I'm writing, and for who I am writing. I think the conclusion I've come to is that I write from an exclusively Christian perspective (since I am, exclusively, of Christian faith), for those who are not Christians. When I make this my aim, I automatically include believers by default, that is, believers who recognize they were once unbelievers. The thing about the Christian faith is that all believers recognize the time when they were not in belief. They recognize the power of a season shift. Too often, communication between the church and those not in the church is filled with a certain jargon (often unaware) that in some ways can be repellent for those even wishing to know more about the faith, and most certainly so for those in opposition to it. Sometimes, in circles I've seen, there is a disconnect because of the language and vehicle in which faith is shared. My vehicle, as a Christian and once not a Christian, is an everyman's tongue, something anyone can listen to. This is achieved foremost on a platform of the best possible quality and form in the area of musicality. I do not continue to sing anything in my catalog of songs that I would not feel at least mostly confident in sharing with an unbeliever. The dialogue in my music for the last six years has been speaking to myself almost exclusively. Examples of this are in my songs "Run," "Sleepwalking," "Cure," "Snow," My Oldest Friend," and continues even further into my new material I am working on now. I am a firm believer in the fact that as a Christian, I am meant to not only create, but create to the best of my ability. I'm not meant to make shitty art. There is simply enough of that. Insofar as I believe I am created beautifully and those around me are equally beautiful, I must, simply must, create beautiful work. Admittedly, not all of my work has been beautiful, but it has come from a place that desires to create beauty. For a time, every artist has good taste and knows it but simply cannot create it because they have to sort of clean out the pipes so to say, getting all the junk out in order to make what is good. Although fearfully and wonderfully made, I am an artist of limitation, and this is what makes art good. I personally want to listen more to an artist that has spent years of his or her life toiling past their personal imperfections and limitations in order to find a groove of beauty they have spent their time pursuing. There is nothing sweeter to my ears. I am still in hot (often slow and grueling) pursuit of that beauty despite my imperfection. Much to my hypocrisy, I have removed many of my early albums from my music store in order to present my best work first (a blatant fa├žade, isn't it?) so that those who are interested in delving into the gritty depths of my musical history, they can inquire via my email.

I am thankful to be a part of this pursuit because I know that is worth it in more ways than I can imagine.

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